12/2; school>lunch>malaysia (2++, reach @ 11++)
13/2; spring cleaning
14/2; Genting
15/2; KL> Majong
16/2; Prepare> Sg!
I think i'll be movingback to blogger.
Because I find that using blogger has more privacy.
I can make it private anytime i want. Hmm and i might be coming back here to post some time later.]
OR even stop blogging, that'll save me a whole lot of trouble then. :)
so,
BYE mf(s)! >:@
Okay, today's just a very )(*&^$#@~!#$%^ day,
FYI; the (*&^%$#!@#$%^, doesn't mean any VULGARITIES!
I WILL CHANGE THIS BAD HABIT OF MINE AND I DEFINITELY WILL!!!
终于雨过天晴啦！I'm sick and tired of what's happening already, thank goodness CNY's just around the corner. -.-
The SYF that we're going this year is like so hard lor the formation, do until very what lehhs.
Off to hub and central w. eileen, yuting, meifei, siti, ziyan & douglas joined us aftermath. Done my third and second piercing, hell pain bodoh! Tingwei still say not pain. Tsk. Had a great laugh along the way. Teehee, Woohoo!
I love this piece, this piece is totally fantastic lahs.
Today, at the bus stop, rayner asked me, why you hate cynthia so much?I was stunned, i don't know how to answer. then i said cause she irritating etc. But you know, whom you be friends w. is like fated. Basically ,me and cynthia is like not fated to be friends barh. At that point of time, i was thinking. ya hor why i hate her so much. hmm, ya lor. tingwei wearing her specs make her look so shuai lahhs, HAHA! She's sucha chiobu leh. Hmm, when should i get my third and second piercing done?
HAHa, this show made me cry like !#@@$#%%!$#@ but it's worth it, i give it 9/10. the one point is for the elder sister's part, so god damn boring, i totally skipped that part, but episode 14 part1 is funny, and xue hai is so cute in that part. HAHA, MUST WATCH OKAY?!
Yesterday:
FEP>Bugis>KBCC>Home.
WHO DO YOU GUYS THINK YOU ARE?! SOME BIG PEOPLE? WHAT RIGHTS DO YOU HAVE TO TELL PEOPLE YOU LIKE OR WHATEVER WHEN YOU DON'T MEAN IT?! WOULD YOU LIKE IT IF PEOPLE DID THIS TO YOU?! HOW WOULD YOU FEEL?! 那么喜欢玩弄人的感情，你是那里不爽啊？！你很了不起吗？！你以为你是什么大人物吗?! YOU GUYS THINK THAT IT'S JUST FOR FUN, WOULD YOU APPRECIATE IT IF YOUR GIRLF OR EVEN A PERSON WHOM YOU LIKE A LOT. DID IT TO YOU?! WOULD YOU?! AND FOR GOODNESS SAKE, YOU CALL THIS CHEERING PEOPLE UP, WHAT'S THE POINT OF SAYING SORRY WHEN YOU'VE ALREADY DONE IT. WHAT'S THE MEANING OF SORRY?! DO YOU EVEN THINK THAT A 5 LETTER WORD CAN JUST MAKE UP FOR WHAT A ATROCIOUS THING YOU'VE DONE? BEAST!! YOU'RE JUST ADDING SALT INTO SOMEONE'S WOUND. JUST BECAUSE YOU'VE NOTHING TO DO, YOU PLAY W. THIS?! VERY NICE TO PLAY RIGHT. VERY ENJOYABLE ISN'T IT?!
edited;
I hate myself, hater myself for being so weak, hate myself for not staying strong, hate myself for everything... why have i become like this. why? i've become so emotional, i can cry at every single moment, when i'm angry, sad, fustrated etc. Even during i watch dramas whereby it's very sad, i'm not like that in the past, i really want to be the old me, i don't want to lead a life like this. I want to be strong, but i can't. i cried 2-4 times today, I'm very negative now, what can i do?
I find this drama okay luh, i don't know why but i feel sad watching this drama, or is it because my mood is ruined by someone? My tian, but i'm very happy that i have my pillars of support, over here, i really thank thank thank you all alot. I'm really very touched, but then most that i'm grateful to is my sis, cl and amirul. :,) thanks for always being there for me when i'm down, despite the attitude that i gave all of you, you didn't neglect me. (everyone) && just now during sectionals, each of you took turns to comfort me and all that even the counsillor which i'm not very close to comfort-ed me.
I think i become very er, very easy cry lor. I watch drama also will cry, angry also will almost cry and etc. And i can't seem to find a good way to vent my anger, fustration and stress. I can only slit my hand or punch something. And today i was so pissed off that i hit the walls , metal and fence my hand can't feel the pain. Hmm, ya that's all i guess.
Wants:
AH, I WANNA PIERCE MY SECOND(RIGHT) AND THIRD(LEFT) EARHOLE LEHHS.
I WANNA NEW PHONE!
I FEEL LIKE PIERCING MY TONGUE BUT MY TONGUE LIKE VERY SHORT.
AND I FEAR THE PAIN, WHAT IF I CAN'T BLOW THE HORN PROPERLY AFTER I PIERCE?
AND PIERCING THE TONGUE MEANS ANTI FOR ALOT OF FOOD
LIKE, ONLY CAN EAT PORRIDGE.
OHMYGOD LA!
RAAAWWWWRRRRR!!!!
Matters
Oh ya bytheway, this year we are going to attend the SYF for the marching band one. Hope we get silver or above lahhs. And i found out that i can't stay in a posture for too long if not my shoulders near my neck will be so suan until pain then i cannot tahan. And that happens during band, class, organ class etc etc. What's the problem w. me? and now w. the SYF thingy, i think my condition will worsen or something. It aches everytime i stay in a postures for too long like even now, it's aching. == I seriously need a BIG BIG rest, ++ i can't wait to go malaysia. Saturday>out w. xinhui. Sunday>Peiyu's house. :) Hope plans will not be ruined. Thinking of this, i realise that i've been through alot w. them. Ups and Downs,
Experience
Example, last year we were trying to see who can kick our shoes higher, then i kick my shoe out of the place. Okay that's when we're not so mature. Hmm, there are times when xinhui does funny things too.
Flash backs, currently
I miss those days where everything is so great. the teachers are good, friends are not so you know. But there's always the situation "i don't friend you" that line. Now, what have i gotten myself into? i myself am not very clear. I feel that i don't seem too exist in this world. Like i'm very extra or something. People always give me that feeling that i'm over reacting or what. I don't like it. I hate it when i lie to my parents just for the sake of going out or staying back. I'll regret it. And i feel that my friends are not there for me when i'm down. they keep asking me "you okay ma?" "why you like that?" "who make you?" Worst still, they don't even know whether i'm happy or not. Or even why am i not happy. What's the reason and all that. Why do i feel so invisible to them? I don't wanna live a life like this. I given so many things(not as in objects) to them, is it wrong to do so? Or is it that i extra extra go do this silly stuffs?
Questions
I know that my attitude is not very good, but i feel improvement compared to last year. Why is it that you people always want to ruin my mood everytime i'm happy/hyper. You won't like it if i ruined yours right. To rayner lim : i don't care what or who you are, you're nothing to me, and i don't give a god damn about what you're doing, i only know that you're irritating. To some people : there's nobody whom will not say anything bad about people, i'm sure some of you did. Or even most of you. I did too, i admit.
Love
I need to clarify this. I don't give a damn about anyone. Stop sreading or even saying someone's name when you think that somethign has happen before.
For example:
First warning, we(addison & i) are just friends. (when you see him & i'm w. you. please stop saying like "eh your boyf. or your husband or whatever, you won't like it if i do this to you)
Second one: I don't know why he(rayner) fucking shout or clap or whatever he did that day in history class. So, please stop saying all those crap.
Third: Stop Mrs Lee -ing or whatever okay. It's not like we(clarence & i) are married or whatever right.
It's really very !@#@!$@% to hear these things. It's irritating, really. Enough is enough. I'm sick and tired of these things. Seriously i wanna be me, myself.
Jerks
Saying all those things when you don't mean it can hurt. So please mind your words.
And please stop flirting w. the girls and girls stop flirting w. the guys. It's really disgusting.
Referring to someone : 一个人，要有自知之明（？）！不要那么三八！it's not good for you, or even your reputation.
Mood : MESSY!
Nothing special lahhs. Mytian, I CAN'T WAIT FOR NEXT WEEK TO COME!!! I wanna get out of this country. Relaxation is what i need, i need to get away from this busy and stressful island.
Like i said in fb,
++ the jerk refers to someone. YOU should know who you are.
hello, we are your seniors! Not juniors, where are your manners or even respect? And don't give that kind of !$##@$@%# face can?
Cooking banana crumble tomorrow, byes,
chatting w. tingwei naoz.
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